Its That Time Again

Adam & Eve Magic Massager Handheld Personal MassagerTrust me, this girl doesn't need a vibrator. What I don't get is the name. Something tells me that Adam and Eve didn't have vibrators. Or that they didn't need them. Hence the human race (if that's what you believe).

In fact, God would have to be pretty stupid to provide Eve with a vibrator.

Tagged! Like being tangoed but less orange

A-

Available: NO! I can't write that enough.
Age: 21

Annoyances: when people walk ridiculously slowly in front of me and when someone sets off the stinkin fire alarm in the dorm.
Afternoons or mornings: afternoons


B
-
Best Friend: tom tom
Beer: fosters
Birthday: april 11th
Best month: august
Best day: Sunday

C
-
Crush: zooey deschanel (with blonde hair)
Candy: fruit pastilles
Color: purple :)
Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla
Criminal Record: indecent exposure

D
-
Day or Night: night
Dream Vehicle: um, a helicopter?

E
-
Easiest Person To Talk To: Tomtom
Eggs: boiled
Everday Routine: Wake up, feed our kitty, nom some cereal, text ginny, go to classes, come home and eat whilst flatmates congregate to watch friends, call ginny/tomtom, maybe go out with ginny, time for bed.

F
-
First Crush: melissa joan hart
Fuck vs Feck: fuck. although I'm partial to abit of irish
Fave piece of clothing: my pink cyberdog tutu
Fave song: Violet by Hole
Future: is firmly ahead of me (Frasier quote!!!)

G
-
Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: worms
Giver or Taker: mmm, sounds kinky! bth
Greatest moment in life: walking home from a massive night out holding hands with the most gorgeous girl in the world :D
Gold or Silver: silver

H
-
Hair: red (think hayley outta paramore in the crushcrushcrush days)
Hat: beret
Hugs: are a distraction whilst your bra is unhooked 0__0

I
-
Ice Cream: cookies and cream
Instrument: little known fact, I played clarinet for four years. I still can too!
Is there anything you would tell yourself 3 years ago: you will one day get laid
Invisible for a Day: I can't think of any invisible deeds other than dirty ones

J-
Jewelry: not much
Job: who knows?
Jeans: I'll take mine skinny

K

-
King for a day: I'd knight russell howard. Sir Russell!

M-
Music: anything with angry girls involved
Movie: But I'm a Cheerleader!

O
-
One Wish: good health for all those I love
One Phobia: caves
One song: That's What You Get by Paramore
One love: Ginny <3

P-
Part Of Your Personality That You Like: cheeky occasionally
Physical Feature on yourself you like: I got good knees
Physical Feature on opposite sex you like: pretty smiles


Q
-
Quick or Slow: slooooooow
Queen for the day: um, can queens knight people? okay, I'll knight mitchell and webb too

R- 

Reason 2 Smile: friends
Reason 2 Cry: onions

S- 

Song You Last Heard: Hot Mess by Cobra Starship

W
-
Worst Habits: sleeping in too late
Worst Day: Monday
Worst thing you own: hee hee hee, don't you read my blog?

I TAG YOU NOW SUCKERS!

Fuckety Fuck Fuck

ah it's been a while methinks.

let's have some vibrator giggles!

I really liked this one! v.cute. and how functional - a sponge and a vibrator! but what made me giggle most was the description - "Vibrator can be used alone without sponge for personal massage..." its all in the ...

now this is just fucking creepy. the idea isn't completely crazy, but a rubber duck in bondage wear??? is that really necessary? and the name! I rub my duckie! holy shit, my childhood memories are forever tainted.

CREEPY AS SHIT

so say you fancy a little 'alone time'. a bit of a de-stresser, some me-time.

You know what I mean, right? right?

I MEAN YOU WANT TO MASTURBATE.

so you settle down with your tools all ready to get to work and then...

YOUR VIBRATOR STARTS TALKING TO YOU!!!

wouldn't you think you'd gone insane? or that your mother had walked in on you? or that God was shouting at you?

really, who the fuck thought a talking dildo would be a good idea? never mind naming a sex toy freddy. look at that evil face on it! i wouldn't let that thing anywhere near my-

now here's an idea i can get on board with. vibrating shorts. how convenient! you could have naughty time anywhere. on the bus, at a friends, in the cinema...

i haven't thought about actually doing that. but it would be pretty fucking sweet to have the option.

FUK-U-OK-U 9000

this one even looks like a finger. really now.

so yes i watched the mtv movie awards last night. yes it was very funny when kstew dropped her award (um hilarious actually, bitch). even more funny when kstew and rpattz reenacted their famous onscreen kiss (oh you guys). and the trailer...
... yeah, about that...
... WHY DOES JASPER HAVE TO BE THE VICTIM?

it just gets to me! he has to take all the blame for edward going all emo on us. so he attacks bella (while looking hawt!). so WHAT?

not tagged

okay, so i stand accused and guilty of not blogging for... a month? i'm not going checking how long so deal with it.

or just check yourself.

i still have three exams. i won't lie and say i'm prepared, but i really have a freshman attitude (pretty much who cares as long as i pass, tis only first year). i mean really i should enjoy this apathy while i can :P

my girlfriend is fucking A++ but shes in 2nd year so she kinda has to study. not to say that i'm not seeing her but more in a kind of temporary fuck bunny status. want me to go into the details? tough, i don't kiss and tell.

anyways:

a film i can always watch: either Ferris Bueller's Day Off or St. Trinians
a book i can always read: definitely Jane Eyre
a band i can always listen to: the long blondes

How Do You Eat Yours

don't ask why i enjoy searching for vibrators masquerading as "massagers". its just funny. this one had me wondering though...

what the hell is that creme egg for???

(it was called the Golden Glass Adult Wand, btw)